Sonics Crazy Life Part 1 of 5
by Aitrus 3
Summary: This is a short story I am working on. In this story Sonic the worlds fastest hegehog on Earth. He faces a new enemy Optimus Prime. He is chased by Optimus and Omega while drinking lots of coffee and doing crazy things. Vordamort is also in it and yes he is gay.
1. Chapter 1

Sonics Crazy Life Part 1 of 5

It was a sunny day and Earth was normal. Optiomus Prime was walking  
down the street when he saw a blue hedgehog. "Hello blue hedgehog have  
you seen any evil Decepticons?"

Sonic looked up at the giant of meetal that toward above him like  
a god of the land and marijuana. Sonic said, "You are in my way. Who do  
you think you are, Cain the freak?! Get out of my way or I will break  
that face that looks like George W. Bush. Not get out of the way you  
fucking piece of flaming fagot dog shit!"

Optimus Prime then aimed his cannons at the blue hedgehog and  
shouted, "Eat this you evil Deception." and fired.

Sonic ran around Optimus Prime's feet and created a cyclone  
knocking Optimus over. Optimus got up and Sonic then used his spin  
dash and hit Optimus strait in the face. Optimus then grabbed Sonic and  
smashed him into a big cup of coffee on top of the coffee shop. Sonic  
fell into the coffee cup and swam to the surface. Optimus then grabbed  
his light saber and said, "I will use my force on you decepticon!"

Optimus charged, but Sonic used his spin dash and pushed the cup  
over the edge causing it to sharer all over the street. Sonic got up,  
he was all brown due to the coffee and he was very wound up too.

Optimus seeing this quickly grabbed Sonic and threw him like a  
baseball into the sky...

Sonic then landed with a thud and started dancing like Mikel  
Jackson and saying, "Coffee, Coffee, Coffee"

Optimus then used the force and lifted Sonic in the air. Sonic then  
pulled out a pot brownie and turned into Super Sonic. Super Sonic then  
grabbed a donut off the ground and ate it. Super Sonic then changed  
color and became Pot Sonic, Sonics most craziest form.

Pot Sonic then ran toward Optimus and started shooting shit from  
his hands. Sonic then drew his hands together and from them he crated  
the shit spirit and Launched it at Optimus. The shot was so powerful  
it blasted Pot Sonic into the horizon so far that he looked like a  
white dot.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Sonic woke up on the floor, he was in the apartment of Omega. Behind him was the window he crashed through. Sonic got up with a groan, he hatted Omega. The last time he meet Omega things got real weird. Omega want to make out with Sonic and Sonic ran then chased him all over town until he ran into Shadow and they went over to Amy's. No robot would ever dare think of Sonic going there. Sonic also knew that he did not want to go into any detail of what happened at Amy's house as it would make the Story rated M or worse. Sonic got up and looked around and saw that he was alone. Sonic walked over to where Omega keep his butt fur collection and opened the door and waked into the hallway. Sonic then went into the kitchen and made him a cup of milkshakes and then went to use the bath room. Sonic then noticed that their was a thong on the floor. Sonic picked it up and shoved it in his mouth. Sonic loved the taste of thongs for breakfast. Sonic then entered Omega bedroom which was just a bare metal room with a charge station for Omega and a bath tube? Yes, tube not tub.

Sonic then heard the lift and heard Omega enter the apartment, but he also heard Shadows, "Finaly Omega we can be alone. Let me show you what a Faker can do."

Sonic was so grossed out that he parfed in his underpants. Yeah Sonic whears then used the force to open the air vent. Sonic climed up and walked around until he could see light. Sonic looked down and saw that Omega, Shadow, and Blaze were making out on the couch. Sonic's face made a weird line and he keept on moving. Sonic landed in a red room filled with bones. Sonic turned around and on the bed was Batman and Superman. Sonic was more weirded out then before.

Batman, "Hey, are you dating Omega too. I also am a fan of that LOVE MUFFIN."

Sonic was realy freaked out and he used the force to break through the wall. Sonic fell through the air and he looked like a falling turd. He used the trick that Count Duku tought him and he landed on the ground safely.. Sonic then said, "Why are all my friends so messed up...

Latter that day:

Sonic's life is more messed up. More in chapter 3


	3. Chapter 3 Knuckles Lemon

Chapter 3: Knuckles Lemon Screen

Sonic was tired of weird things, all he wanted to do was relax Sonic took off his gloves and threw them in the dirty pile of clothes. Sonic then sat down on the couch and played there. Sonic's peace did not last. A ring from the door bell came and Sonic jumped up and grabbed some clean gloves and opened the door. It was the red guy Knuckles, Sonic looked at the large red beast and said, "What do you want!"

Knuckles then said, "Well I was out of toolkit paper and I peed on your lawn. Anyway I came over to see if you want to play Call of Dudley and hang out."

Sonic did not want to leave the read beast out side as it would get the unwanted attention from the cops. Sonic then let him in and they both sat on the couch playing the worst modern game ever. At 1 in the evening Sonic woke up, he was laying next to Knuckles and his hand was not in a good place. Sonic quickly got up and went into the kitchen and warmed up some enchiladas and shoved them up his ass. Sonic then took them and rubbed them on Knuckles face and he started eating them. Sonic then started kissing Knuckles and they started making out.

It was now 12:09 A.M. And Knuckles was in the kitchen and was eating a pack of white stuff. Sonic then said, "Hey you don't eat those we are going to need those if this story is going to have a lemon in it. We don't want the readers to lose interest."

Knuckles brought over a bottle of beer and poured it over Sonic. Sonic grabbed Knuckles and the they started making out and went up stairs to make love.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4 Amy Three Lemons

Sonic and Knuckles were upstairs having fun when they heard a knocking on the door. Sonic went down stairs and opened it. Amy and Shadow both rushed in and knocked Sonic on the ground. Sonic then grabed Amy and goosed her in front of Shadow. Sonic then said to her, :"Hey my baby me and Knuckles are going crazy do you want to join us. We can have a party together and play the games together."

Amy, "Oh Sonic, I would love to LOVE with you. I call dibs first and Knuckles can go latter. Oh do you have the box of white protection?"

Sonic, "I did but Knuckles ate them all. I know it might be dangerous but lets go and play."

Sonic and Amy went up the stairs in a dash while Shadow was standing in aw. Shadow then sat down on the couch and noticed that their was poop stains all over it. Shadow then decided that he would go and vist Mireaha and do something better then this. Shadow grabed his coat and walked out the door while slaming it behind him. Shadow decided that he would run there.

More in chapter 5


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Shadow had arrived at Maria's house and he was ready to get back to NORMAL again. Shadow knocked on the door three times. Maria opened the door and looked down at Shadow, she ran toward him and gave him a big hug. She then dragged the black hedgehog in side and sat him down. Shadow had not been over here in a while and he noticed things were different. Maria had a sad look on her face and Shadow then asked, "Maria what is wrong?"

Maria then said, "Well you I got a laptop for my work yesterday. I found out it was a Toshiba and I thought that this might be nice. I then tried to install Linux Mint and it did not work. I tried and tried but it didn't. I then put Linux Mint on the drive and now it does not do anything. Oh Shadow I am so sad." Maria then busted in tears and Shadows face got all red. Shadow walked out the door and closed it quietly. Shadow then said out load, "How dare they hurt Maria! I will MAKE THEM PAY FOR THIS!" Shadow then used Chaos Control and he darted down the street.

Meanwhile back at Sonic's house:

Sonic, Knuckles, Amy, and Tails Doll were finished from having SEX. Sonic walked over to the TV and said, "Wow its latte all ready. Man I was suppose to fight the Deceptions today. I better get moving if I am going to be on time."

Sonic then walked into the bath room. To his dismay he saw Tails, Eggman, Mario, Cheese, Silver, Manic, Sonya, and Omega all making out. The writer does not go into any more details of this lemon. Sonic then said, "Hey just make sure you all have condoms." Sonic then shut the door behind him and grabbed his coat and put on his pants. That is right Sonic sleeps commando and he does not own underwear only thongs.

At Hogwarts...

Optimums was in a battle of epic power. Optimums jumped up from a fallen tower and shouted, "Gabbiness" and ducked avoiding the spells from the Deceptions. Recently Lord Vordamort teamed up with the Decepitcons to take over the world. Optimums activated his jets and he flew over the battle field. He had to find Sonic the Hedgehog and fast.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Shadows King

It was late at night and Sonic was out buying gifts for all his friends. He had got gifts for everyone and was now looking at Victoria Secret. Sonic liked looking at the models who were in the store. Sonic then siged and bicked up his bages and walked down the sidewalk with swag. Sonic looked on the ground and picked up a used condom and shoved it in his mouth. Sonic then continued at his pace looking left and right. Sonic then heard the sound of jets above him. Sonic looked up and saw Optimus flying above him. Sonics mouth was wide open. Optimus was wearing a wizard hat and a cloak. In fact he remined Sonic of his child's father Count Doku. Optimus waved his magic wand and the bages Sonic was carring flew up in the air. "Hey I needed those.", shouted Sonic.

Optimus then said, "Sonic I need your help. The Decepticons have teamed up with Lord Vordamort and are planing to take over the Universe. We need to work together if we are going to stop can not let humanity suffer. We must ride." Before Sonic could object Optimus blasted them off into the sky and they were souring over the planet...

Shadow was on the botom floor of Toshibas HQ and he was fuking pissed. Shadow had only two chaos emralds but that was enough for him to destroy Toshiba. Shadow knew that he would make them pay for hurting Maria and he would never ever let any of them live after this day. Shadow then said out loud, "It is time to get rid of evil in mankind once and for all. I am Shadow the Hedgehog and I AM GOD! HERE ME TOHSIBA YOU ARE GOING DOWN!."

Shadow entered the building and a recpecionest was at the counter. Shadow grabed both emralds in each hand. Shadow then pointed his pinkys at her and boom. All that was left of the lobby was a huge flameing crater.

Silver was at home at he and Blaze were just fineshed having a three way (sex). Silver was ready to relax and unwind. Silver was bored and I mean bored. Blaze was sleeping upstairs in his bed as Silver was so good that she was all tired out. Now what was their for a hedgehog like Silver to do. Silver got up off the couch and grabed the remote and turned on the tv. Silver then walked in to his kitchen which was bigger then Sonics and smaller then eggmans. As we all know Robotnic can cook and that is why all the old hages love him. Silver then decided that he would go out and look for a bimbo to have sex with instead of waiting for Blaze to feel "in the mood". Blaze grabed a sticky note and placed it on the tv it read:

_**Dear Blaze,**_

_**I'm going out to find a bimbo while you are resting up. Just rember to use the litter box and not pee on the rug. I also wanted to tell you that Amy and I had a child. I still love you and this is why I'm telling you this. I am not bringing the bimbo here and when I get back we can have more sex. I love you with all my heart and I hope you can dance in your dreams and not fear evil leapicons.**_

_**Love your Silver**_

Silver knew the best place to find Bimbos, Amy's house. Amy always had bembos around ever since she got pregnat with Silver's child and Count Doku's.

More in chapter 7


End file.
